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Jan says that the unsuccessful trips make you appreciate the successful ones. I don’t know, I learn enough on these trips so they aren’t really unsuccessful or failues, but they tick me off just the same.
Jan and I tore out of Oakland at 4 am and got into Lower Lake for some refreshments and fuel around 6 or so. I had read many, many accounts for the county highpoint of Yolo and the Milktoast Highway, and I felt we were prepared. I had a whole bottle of Technu and a pair loppers purchased specifically for this hike. I was rarin’ to go. I had also read at least two warnings of the mud and one account of the Mud Pirate who lives near the end of this public road. In the winter, the dirt road is not maintained and is gated at the pass, where our trailhead is. Well, we were traveling up the road and the road started to get a little wet in the ruts. Didn’t look too bad so I went around the next corner. Now there was a lot of water in the ruts, but it still didn’t look that bad. It didn’t matter, I recognized the area as the realm of the Mud Pirate and I began to back out.
Unfortunately, I cut the inside corner of a turn closer than I should have. Two feet of water-soaked road collapsed into the gully, taking my front tire with it. The whole car shifted laterally about 3 ft. We got out and stacked rocks under the front tire, but any further backing caused the rear tires to loose traction and also start sliding toward the gully. Further sliding would have produced an unpleasant roll of the vehicle. And it was Chari’s vehicle! Now I was furious. I had read and understood the warnings, and yet here I was in the back-and-beyond with a car that wanted to roll off the road and only the Mud Pirate living nearby.
Amazingly, I had cell phone reception and Jan had AAA. We called, and AAA said they were sending a tow truck service for is that should arrive in about 90 minutes. One hour through that the company called me back saying they couldn’t make it up the road in the trucks they owned, and they would have to refer me to a 4WD tow company . . . which did not take AAA. The 4WD drive company quoted me the price of $150 dollars and hour, from their door to their door. Would I accept? Well, gee, and my other option would be? When he finally did arrive, Rich’s 4WD Towing was humorful, helpful, and professional. He looped a winch around my front tire and slid the front end right back onto the road. Slippery mud works both ways, up or down. He looped the back end and did the same thing, effectively moving the whole truck 8 ft away from the road edge. He gave me a few more pointers on driving in 4WD (which I already knew, but I was the sheepish city slicker at that point, so I dutifully listened and paid attention) before we drove out of there.
Now, you may wonder why I’m calling this landowner the Mud Pirate. The moniker was contrived by Bob, I believe, during a hike in this area with Dingus. They saw what we confirmed. This arrogant *$%!# apparently does not want people to drive by his land, regardless of public road status. So he runs a hose from some water source up the hill and MUDS DOWN THE ROAD HIMSELF. I’m not kidding. Check the pictures. The serpentine soils in this area make the most gawd-awful, slick, cakey mud I’ve ever seen. It doesn’t even take that much water and you can slide around just like on the ice rink back home. I don’t know what his deal is, but I guess it includes making a dangerous spot in the road to ensnare idiots such as me, even forwarned idiots like me. But what can you do? Do you think this ranks up there on the things public officials care about in the county. No. It’s the end of a road unmaintained in winter, so if it’s crap condition, even under malicious intent, they probably won’t care (but I don’t know that yet, I still haven’t reported the guy). Argh. I’d fume and scream but it doesn’t come over in typeset very well.
By the time Jan and I were freed, it was 11, and there was no chance of us making the round trip in daylight. To enforce the matter, we picked off two ticks from our clothes, even from just standing in the road. Next time, next time.
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